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Human Relations MGMT611

Lesson 16

BUILDING SELF-CONFIDENCE

"Confidence gives you courage and extends your reach. It lets you take greater risks and achieve far more

than you ever thought possible" (Capitalism Magazine, 2002).

Self Confidence:

Self-confidence is extremely important in almost every aspect of our lives, yet so many people struggle to

find it. People who lack self-confidence can find it difficult to become successful. We have learnt that self-

esteem is a sum-total of self-confidence and self-respect. Self-respect mostly depends upon self-confidence.

Self-confidence is emphasized because of its importance in self-efficacy and performing well at job and in

personal life. Many early careerists need to develop their self-confidence before they can be effective

leaders.

The importance of self-confidence and self-efficacy:

Self-confidence is the ability and belief in our self to do those tasks that are given to us by our self or by

other people in our family or from our employers. It is a kind of mental and physical force to do the job we

are assigned to do.

For solving day-to-day problems, a moderate amount of self-confidence may be good enough but growing

confidence through doing of things can lead to ever-increasing potential to do more and more; and thereby

attaining successes throughout our life.

Self-confidence is also important because it leads to self-efficacy (the belief in one's capability to perform a

task).

An experiment with unemployed people showed that self-efficacy can be boosted through training. A leader

with high self-efficacy will usually believe that a task is doable.

Assessing self-confidence:

Self confidence can be assessed. Here is an instrument through which we can find out the level of self-

confidence. Assessing the level of self-confidence we can boost up the level of confidence.

Indicate the extent to which you agree with each or the following statement.

Use a 1-5 scale: 1=disagree strongly; 2=disagree; 3=neutral; 4=agree; 5=agree strongly

Sr Dimension

DS D N A AS

I frequently say to people, "I am not sure".

5 4321

I perform well in most situations in life.

1 2345

I willingly offer advice to others.

1 2345

Before making even a minor decision, I usually consult with 5 4 3 2 1

several people.

5 I am generally willing to attempt new activities for which I have 1 2 3 4 5

very little related skill or experience

6 Speaking in front of the class or other group is a frightening 5 4 3 2 1

experience for me

7 I experience stress when people challenge me on the spot.

5 4321

8 I feel comfortable attending a social event by myself.

1 2345

9 I am much more of a winner than loser.

1 2345

10 I am cautious about making substantial change in my life.

5 4321

Total score .........................

Scoring and interpretation: Calculate your total score by adding the numbers ticked.

A tentative interpretation of the scoring is as follows:

Human Relations MGMT611

45-50

Very high self-confidence with perhaps a tendency toward arrogance

38-44

A high, desirable level of self-confidence

30-37

Moderate or average self-confidence

10-29

Self-confidence needs strengthening

Source: DuBrin, Andrew J. `Human Relations: Career and Personal Success', Pearson Prentice Hall, 2005,

p412.

Developing self-confidence:

Self-confidence really can be learned and built on. And, whether you're working on your own self-

confidence or building the confidence of people around you, it's well-worth the effort! All other things

being equal, self-confidence is often the single ingredient that distinguishes a successful person from

someone less successful.

Self-confidence is generally achieved by succeeding in a variety of situations.

Specific methods of boosting self-confidence are given below.

Steps to build self-confidence:

These are certain steps which can be followed to build up self-confidence

Write down Personal Assets and Achievements:

Reflect on what's good about you to increase self-appreciation and therefore self-confidence. A written list

of assets is particularly useful. An important supplement to listing your own assets is hearing the opinion of

others on your good points.

List of personal attributes:

We must have an inventory of our personal attributes.

· Good listener

· Most people like me

· Good handwriting

· Good posture

· Inquisitive mind

· Good at solving problems

· Above-average Internet search skills

· Good sense of humour

· Patient with people who make mistakes

· Good looking

· Graduated tenth in a class of 50

· Achieved first place in local cricket tournament

· Daughter has an excellent career

· Good mechanical skills including automotive and computer repair

· Work well under pressure

· Good dancer

· Friendly with strangers

· Great physical health

· Good cook

· Can laugh at my own mistakes

· Favourable personal appearance

· Respectful to your authorities

· Made award-winning suggestion that saved company a lot of money

· Scored winning goal in college hockey match

· Saved a child from drowning

Human Relations MGMT611

Develop a Solid Knowledge Base:

A bedrock strategy for projecting self-confidence is to develop a base of knowledge that enables a person to

provide sensible alternative solutions to problems.

C. Use positive self talk:

A basic method of building self-confidence is to engage in positive self-talk, saying positive things about

oneself to oneself. First, state the incident that casts doubt about self-worth. Second, state what the incident

does not mean, followed by third, what it does mean. Fourth, objectively account for the cause of the

incident. Fifth, identify ways to prevent the incident from happening again. Sixth, use positive self-talk.

D. Avoid Negative Self-Talk:

Minimize negative statements about yourself in order to bolster self-confidence. Negative self-statements

such as "I may be stupid but..." and "I know I'm usually wrong but..." detract from self-confidence.

E. Use Positive Visual Imagery:

Again, visualization is important for acquiring human relations skills. Positive visual imagery is picturing a

positive outcome in one's mind. The technique is effective for gaining control of an upcoming, challenging

situation.

Strive for Peak Performance:

Strive to do the best what you can. Peak performance is the mental state necessary for achieving maximum

results from minimum effort.

Experiencing peak performance in various tasks over a long period of time would move a person

toward self-actualization.

b. It involves extraordinary focus and concentration.

Peak performers have a mission in their work and personal lives.

d. Charles Garfield says that peak performers have a mission in their work and lives, and are therefore

fully committed.

G. Bounce Back from Setbacks and Embarrassments:

An effective confidence builder is to convince yourself that you can conquer adversity such as setbacks and

embarrassments, thus being resilient. Do not take set backs personally.

H. Get Past the Emotional Turmoil:

The emotional impact of severe job adversity can rival the loss of a personal relationship, and creates stress.

Accept the reality of your problem and do not take the setback personally. Get help from your support

network.

Find a Creative Solution to Your Problem:

To search for creative solutions to the adversity problem, use the problem-solving and decision-making

steps learnt in previous lectures.

Balanced Self-Confidence:

Neither being over-confident nor being under-confidence is good for people. There must be balance

between the two extremes. Good self-confidence is about having the right amount of confidence, founded

on your true abilities and skills. With the right amount of self-confidence, you will take informed risks and

do not stretch yourself unnecessarily. On the other hand, if you are under-confident, you'll avoid taking

risks and stretching yourself. In this way you will not make use of your potential fully. So, self-confidence is

something based on realistic expectations on your skills and experience, for achieving your goals.

Human Relations MGMT611

References:

Dubrin, A.J. (2005). Human Relations: Career and Personal Success. Upper Saddle River, New Jersey,

07458.

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