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Human Relations

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Human Relations­ MGMT611
VU
Lesson 16
BUILDING SELF-CONFIDENCE
"Confidence gives you courage and extends your reach. It lets you take greater risks and achieve far more
than you ever thought possible" (Capitalism Magazine, 2002).
Self Confidence:
Self-confidence is extremely important in almost every aspect of our lives, yet so many people struggle to
find it. People who lack self-confidence can find it difficult to become successful. We have learnt that self-
esteem is a sum-total of self-confidence and self-respect. Self-respect mostly depends upon self-confidence.
Self-confidence is emphasized because of its importance in self-efficacy and performing well at job and in
personal life. Many early careerists need to develop their self-confidence before they can be effective
leaders.
The importance of self-confidence and self-efficacy:
Self-confidence is the ability and belief in our self to do those tasks that are given to us by our self or by
other people in our family or from our employers. It is a kind of mental and physical force to do the job we
are assigned to do.
For solving day-to-day problems, a moderate amount of self-confidence may be good enough but growing
confidence through doing of things can lead to ever-increasing potential to do more and more; and thereby
attaining successes throughout our life.
Self-confidence is also important because it leads to self-efficacy (the belief in one's capability to perform a
task).
An experiment with unemployed people showed that self-efficacy can be boosted through training. A leader
with high self-efficacy will usually believe that a task is doable.
Assessing self-confidence:
Self confidence can be assessed. Here is an instrument through which we can find out the level of self-
confidence. Assessing the level of self-confidence we can boost up the level of confidence.
Indicate the extent to which you agree with each or the following statement.
Use a 1-5 scale: 1=disagree strongly; 2=disagree; 3=neutral; 4=agree; 5=agree strongly
Sr Dimension
DS D N A AS
1
I frequently say to people, "I am not sure".
5  4321
2
I perform well in most situations in life.
1  2345
3
I willingly offer advice to others.
1  2345
4
Before making even a minor decision, I usually consult with 5  4 3 2 1
several people.
5 I am generally willing to attempt new activities for which I have 1  2 3 4 5
very little related skill or experience
6 Speaking in front of the class or other group is a frightening 5  4 3 2 1
experience for me
7 I experience stress when people challenge me on the spot.
5  4321
8 I feel comfortable attending a social event by myself.
1  2345
9 I am much more of a winner than loser.
1  2345
10 I am cautious about making substantial change in my life.
5  4321
Total score .........................
Scoring and interpretation: Calculate your total score by adding the numbers ticked.
A tentative interpretation of the scoring is as follows:
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Human Relations­ MGMT611
VU
45-50
Very high self-confidence with perhaps a tendency toward arrogance
38-44
A high, desirable level of self-confidence
30-37
Moderate or average self-confidence
10-29
Self-confidence needs strengthening
Source: DuBrin, Andrew J. `Human Relations: Career and Personal Success', Pearson Prentice Hall, 2005,
p412.
Developing self-confidence:
Self-confidence really can be learned and built on. And, whether you're working on your own self-
confidence or building the confidence of people around you, it's well-worth the effort! All other things
being equal, self-confidence is often the single ingredient that distinguishes a successful person from
someone less successful.
Self-confidence is generally achieved by succeeding in a variety of situations.
Specific methods of boosting self-confidence are given below.
Steps to build self-confidence:
These are certain steps which can be followed to build up self-confidence
A.
Write down Personal Assets and Achievements:
Reflect on what's good about you to increase self-appreciation and therefore self-confidence. A written list
of assets is particularly useful. An important supplement to listing your own assets is hearing the opinion of
others on your good points.
List of personal attributes:
We must have an inventory of our personal attributes.
ˇ  Good listener
ˇ  Most people like me
ˇ  Good handwriting
ˇ  Good posture
ˇ  Inquisitive mind
ˇ  Good at solving problems
ˇ  Above-average Internet search skills
ˇ  Good sense of humour
ˇ  Patient with people who make mistakes
ˇ  Good looking
ˇ  Graduated tenth in a class of 50
ˇ  Achieved first place in local cricket tournament
ˇ  Daughter has an excellent career
ˇ  Good mechanical skills including automotive and computer repair
ˇ  Work well under pressure
ˇ  Good dancer
ˇ  Friendly with strangers
ˇ  Great physical health
ˇ  Good cook
ˇ  Can laugh at my own mistakes
ˇ  Favourable personal appearance
ˇ  Respectful to your authorities
ˇ  Made award-winning suggestion that saved company a lot of money
ˇ  Scored winning goal in college hockey match
ˇ  Saved a child from drowning
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Human Relations­ MGMT611
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B.
Develop a Solid Knowledge Base:
A bedrock strategy for projecting self-confidence is to develop a base of knowledge that enables a person to
provide sensible alternative solutions to problems.
C.  Use positive self talk:
A basic method of building self-confidence is to engage in positive self-talk, saying positive things about
oneself to oneself. First, state the incident that casts doubt about self-worth. Second, state what the incident
does not mean, followed by third, what it does mean. Fourth, objectively account for the cause of the
incident. Fifth, identify ways to prevent the incident from happening again. Sixth, use positive self-talk.
D.  Avoid Negative Self-Talk:
Minimize negative statements about yourself in order to bolster self-confidence. Negative self-statements
such as "I may be stupid but..." and "I know I'm usually wrong but..." detract from self-confidence.
E.  Use Positive Visual Imagery:
Again, visualization is important for acquiring human relations skills. Positive visual imagery is picturing a
positive outcome in one's mind. The technique is effective for gaining control of an upcoming, challenging
situation.
F.
Strive for Peak Performance:
Strive to do the best what you can. Peak performance is the mental state necessary for achieving maximum
results from minimum effort.
a.
Experiencing peak performance in various tasks over a long period of time would move a person
toward self-actualization.
b. It involves extraordinary focus and concentration.
c.
Peak performers have a mission in their work and personal lives.
d. Charles Garfield says that peak performers have a mission in their work and lives, and are therefore
fully committed.
G.  Bounce Back from Setbacks and Embarrassments:
An effective confidence builder is to convince yourself that you can conquer adversity such as setbacks and
embarrassments, thus being resilient. Do not take set backs personally.
H.  Get Past the Emotional Turmoil:
The emotional impact of severe job adversity can rival the loss of a personal relationship, and creates stress.
Accept the reality of your problem and do not take the setback personally. Get help from your support
network.
I.
Find a Creative Solution to Your Problem:
To search for creative solutions to the adversity problem, use the problem-solving and decision-making
steps learnt in previous lectures.
Balanced Self-Confidence:
Neither being over-confident nor being under-confidence is good for people. There must be balance
between the two extremes. Good self-confidence is about having the right amount of confidence, founded
on your true abilities and skills. With the right amount of self-confidence, you will take informed risks and
do not stretch yourself unnecessarily. On the other hand, if you are under-confident, you'll avoid taking
risks and stretching yourself. In this way you will not make use of your potential fully. So, self-confidence is
something based on realistic expectations on your skills and experience, for achieving your goals.
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Human Relations­ MGMT611
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References:
Dubrin, A.J. (2005). Human Relations: Career and Personal Success. Upper Saddle River, New Jersey,
07458.
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Table of Contents:
  1. HUMAN RELATIONS:Some Guidelines for Effective Human Relations, Communication has 3meanings
  2. CULTURE AND PERSONALITY:Definition of sub culture, Definition of Personality, Types of Persons
  3. PERSONALITY AND STRESS:Personality, PERSONAL TOOLS TO CONTROL STRESS
  4. PERCEPTION AND INDIVIDUAL BEHAVIOUR:Three concepts of personality, Bias in Perception
  5. PERCEPTION AND GROUP BEHAVIOR:Characteristics of Groups, Individual and Group Behavior
  6. ATTITUDE AND BEHAVIOUR:Types of Attitudes, Steps to turn attitude into action
  7. PERSONAL MOTIVATION AND ACHIEVEMENT:Needs and Motivation, Self-discipline and motivation
  8. SOLVING PROBLEMS SKILLFULLY:Problem solving and cognition, Ways to solve problems
  9. CREATIVITY IN PROBLEM SOLVING:Barriers to creativity, Tips to solve problems creatively
  10. HANDLING PERSONAL ISSUES:Self-Defeating Behaviour, Positive attitude to tackle personal problems
  11. CONFLICT RESOLUTION:WHY SO MUCH CONFLICT EXISTS, TECHNIQUES FOR RESOLVING CONFLICTS
  12. COMMUNICATION AND HUMAN RELATIONS:Process of communication, Improving gender barriers to communication
  13. ORGANIZATIONAL COMMUNICATION:To improve listening skills, Types of organizational communication
  14. UNDERSTANDING COMMUNICATION STYLES:Modeling communication style, Sociability continuum
  15. SELF-ESTEEM:Building process of self-esteem, Self-esteem and public image
  16. BUILDING SELF-CONFIDENCE:The importance of self-confidence and self-efficacy, Balanced Self-Confidence:
  17. BECOMING A LEADER-1:Assessing leadership role, Traits and Characteristics of Effective Leaders
  18. BECOMING A LEADER-II:Theories of leadership, Developing leadership potential
  19. GLOBALIZATION AND CROSS-CULTURAL DIFFERENCES:Religious Values and Bicultural Identities
  20. IMPROVING CROSS-CULTURAL COMPETENCE:Strategies to improve cross-cultural relations, More steps to improve Cultural Relations
  21. BUILDING GOOD RELATIONS WITH MANAGERS:Impressing your manager, Coping with a problem manager
  22. BUILDING GOOD RELATIONS WITH CO-WORKERS:Make Co-workers feel important, Maintain Honest and Open Relationships
  23. BUILDING GOOD RELATIONS WITH CUSTOMERS:Salesperson Represents the Business, Approaching the Customer, Excuses vs. Objections
  24. CHOOSING A CAREER-1:Ten Myths about Choosing a Career, Attitude toward and Perceptions about Myself
  25. CHOOSING A CAREER-II:Choosing a career and developing a portfolio Career, Suggestions for career Preparation
  26. FINDING A JOB:Targeting your job search, The Internet and Résumé Database Services, Extreme Job Hunting
  27. SIGNIFICANCE OF RESUME:Major types of resumes, Electronic Submission of the Résumé
  28. IMPROVING INTERVIEW SKILLS:Successful interview, Knowing the employer or Organization
  29. IMPROVING WORK HABITS-1:Reasons of procrastination, Techniques for Reducing Procrastination
  30. IMPROVING WORK HABITS-2:Developing the proper attitudes and values, Time-management techniques
  31. NEW MODEL OF CAREER ADVANCEMENT:Career portability, HUMAN RELATIONS SELF-ASSESSMENT
  32. TAKING CONTROL OF YOURSELF:Develop Outstanding Interpersonal Skills, Business etiquettes
  33. EXERTING CONTROL ON OUTSIDE ENVIRONMENT:Important communication tip, Exerting control over the outside world
  34. MANAGING PERSONAL FINANCES-1:Your personal financial plan, Steps in budget making
  35. MANAGING PERSONAL FINANCES-2:Basic investment principles, Tolerance for Investment Risks, Types of investments
  36. ACHIEVING HAPPINESS-1:Finding happiness and enhancing your personal life, The key to happiness
  37. ACHIEVING HAPPINESS-2:The Five Principles of Psychological Functioning, Your mind and Happiness
  38. ACHIEVING HAPPINESS-3:Need for intimacy, Working out issues with relationships
  39. APATHY AND ITS REMEDIES:Let us try to understand the various definitions of apathy, Coping strategies for apathy
  40. ENHANCING PERSONAL ETHICS-1:Influence of Culture, Common ethical problems
  41. ENHANCING PERSONAL ETHICS-2:Common ethical problems, Guidelines for Behaving Ethically
  42. HELPING OTHERS GROW:Being a Nurturing, Positive Person, A list of mentoring behaviour, Coaching skills and techniques
  43. REVIEW-I:What is a Human Relation?, Meanings of Communication, Two types of stress, Some personal problem, Communication style
  44. REVIEW-II:Steps to build self-confidence, Globalization, Building Good Relations with Co-workers, Good work habits
  45. REVIEW-III:New model of career advancement, Choosing your investment, Tactics for Dealing with Difficult People