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Theories
of Communication MCM 511
VU
LESSON
43
TRENDS
IN MASS COMMUNICATION II
Four
Principles of Interpersonal
Communication
These
principles underlie the workings in
real life of interpersonal
communication. They are
basic to
communication.
We can't ignore them
Interpersonal
communication is inescapable
We
can't not communicate. The
very attempt not to communicate
communicates something.
Through
not
only words, but through tone
of voice and through gesture, posture,
facial expression, etc., we
constantly
communicate to those around
us.
Through
these channels, we constantly receive
communication from others.
Even
when you sleep, you
communicate. Remember a basic principle
of communication in general:
people
are not mind readers.
Another way to put this
is: people judge you by
your behavior, not
your
intent.
Interpersonal
communication is irreversible
You
can't really take back something
once it has been said. The
effect must inevitably
remain.
Despite
the instructions from a judge to a
jury to "disregard that last
statement the witness made," the
lawyer
knows that it can't help
but make an impression on the jury. A
Russian proverb says, "Once
a
word
goes out of your mouth,
you can never swallow it
again."
Interpersonal
communication is complicated
No
form of communication is simple.
Because of the number of variables
involved, even simple
requests
are extremely
complex...
Theorists
note that whenever we communicate there
are really at least six
"people" involved:
1)
Who you think you
are
2)
Who you think the other
person is
3)
Who you think the other
person thinks you
are
4)
Who the other person thinks
/she is
5)
Who the other person thinks
you are
6)
Who the other person thinks
you think s/he is
We
don't actually swap ideas;
we swap symbols that stand
for ideas. This also
complicates
communication.
Words
(symbols) do not have inherent
meaning; we simply use them in
certain ways, and no two
people
use
the same word exactly
alike.
Communication
Maxims
Osmo
Wiio gives us some
communication maxims similar to Murphy's
Law (Osmo Wiio, Wiio's
Laws--
and
Some Others (Espoo,
Finland: Welin-Goos, 1978)
:
If
communication can fail, it
will.
If
a message can be understood in different
ways, it will be understood in just that
way which does the
most
harm.
There
is always somebody who knows
better than you what
you meant by your
message.
Communication
takes place in a context that mixes
interpersonal communication interactions
with social
clustering.
The
more communication there is, the more difficult it is
for communication to
succeed.
These
tongue-in-cheek maxims are not
real principles; they simply
humorously remind us of the
difficulty
of accurate communication.
134
Theories
of Communication MCM 511
VU
Interpersonal
communication is contextual
In
other words, communication does
not happen in isolation. There
is:
Psychological
context, which is
who you are and what
you bring to the
interaction.
Your
needs, desires, values, personality,
etc., all form the
psychological context. ("You"
here refers to
both
participants in the interaction.)
Relational
context, which
concerns your reactions to the other
person--the "mix."
Situational
context deals
with the psycho-social "where" you
are communicating.
An
interaction that takes place in a
classroom will be very
different from one that
takes place in a bar.
Environmental
context deals
with the physical "where"
you are communicating.
Furniture, location,
noise
level, temperature, season, time of
day, all are examples of
factors in the environmental
context.
Cultural
context includes
all the learned behaviors and rules that
affect the interaction.
If
you come from a culture
(foreign or within your own
country) where it is considered rude to make
long,
direct eye contact, you will
out of politeness avoid eye
contact.
If
the other person comes from
a culture where long, direct eye contact
signals trustworthiness, then we
have
in the cultural context a basis
for misunderstanding.
Barriers
against Effective Interpersonal
Communication
1.
Emotions- Sometimes
when people communicate an idea or matter
across, the receiver can
feel how
the
sender perceives the subject matter.
Often messages are
interpreted differently for
different people in
a
clear manner.
Extreme
emotions are most likely to
hinder effective communication
because the idea or
message
maybe
misinterpreted.
It's
always best to avoid
responding or reacting to the subject matter
when you're upset or angry
because
most
of the time, you'll not be
able to think.
2.
Filtering-This is
where the sender manipulates the information
that he communicates to the
receiver.
The
purpose of this is because
sometimes people would shape
and reform the message so that it
appears
and
sounds favorable to the
receiver.
Filtering
information may mislead the receiver
into thinking into something
favorable and the let
down
may
be upsetting if it's found
out that information has
been filtered.
3.
Overloaded with
Information-Too
much information about the
same subject matter may be
confusing.
For example, you have 50 e-mails on the
same subject matter; each e-mail contains
a little
part
of the subject matter.
It
would be better to have one e-mail
from the sender which
includes all the information in clear
and
simple
form with only the
information you want that
you asked for.
Normally,
the human brain can only
take in so much information to
process, overloading it
with
information
will exceed our human
processing capacity and the receiver
would often misunderstand or
not
understand at all what the sender is
telling them.
4.
Defensiveness-Humans tend
to refuse for a mutual
understanding when they feel
that they are
being
threatened
or are put in a position
which they are at a
disadvantage.
Defensiveness
normally consists of attacking
what the sender tells you,
putting out sarcastic
remarks,
questioning
their motives or being
overly judgmental about the subject
matter.
5.
Cultural Difference-Sometimes
our culture may be a huge
hindrance for effective
interpersonal
communication.
135
Theories
of Communication MCM 511
VU
When
two people with different
cultures communicate, they often do not
understand each other's
cultures
and may misunderstand the true meaning of
what each other are
trying to convey through
such
a
sense.
6.
Jargon- Not
everyone understands each
other's jargon words. Jargon should be
avoided when talking
to
someone who isn't familiar
with you personally or
within your
organization.
Overcoming
the Barriers of Effective
Interpersonal Communication
1.
Simplify Language- By
structuring your language to clear
simplistic sentences, the receiver
would
be
able to easily understand what the
sender is saying. For
example, jargon can be used
within your
organization
as it will only use one word
rather than a whole sentence to
explain what you are
trying to
communicate
across.
2.
Constrain Emotions- Hold back
emotions whilst discussing a certain
sensitive issue. By speaking
through
a neutral manner, it allows mutual
understanding to occur and for both
sender and receiver to
communicate
in a rational manner.
3.
Listen actively- Often,
when the sender says something, the
receiver normally hears but
does not
listen.
Place
yourself in the sender's position
and try to understand exactly
what they are trying to
convey to
you.
The receiver is trying to understand
fully what the sender is
trying to say, so putting the receiver
in
the
sender's point of view makes
understanding much easier.
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