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TAKING CONTROL OF YOURSELF:Develop Outstanding Interpersonal Skills, Business etiquettes

<< NEW MODEL OF CAREER ADVANCEMENT:Career portability, HUMAN RELATIONS SELF-ASSESSMENT
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Human Relations­ MGMT611
VU
Lesson 32
TAKING CONTROL OF YOURSELF
Enthusiasm
Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 - 1882), U.S. poet and essayist.
Nothing is as contagious as enthusiasm. It is the genius of sincerity and truth accomplishes no victories
without it.
Attributed to Bulwer Lytton (1803 - 1873), British novelist and politician.
Passion is like genius: a miracle.
Romain Rolland (1866 - 1944) French writer.
A variety of factors makes us do what we do not want to do. We will learn to control our behaviour and
importance of flexibility. In the previous lecture we have learnt about horizontal growth instead of vertical
growth. In this lecture we will learn those behaviors which are beneficial to us in terms of satisfaction and
bringing rewards to us from the organizations we work for.
Taking control of yourself
The new model of career advancement fits a definition of career success as attaining the twin goals of
organizational rewards and personal satisfaction. The same definition fits the theme of this text.
The tactics and strategies in this section center on the idea of individuals taking control of them in order to
advance in their career. If you have control over yourself then you will have control over the resources
around.
How to take control of yourself
A. Develop Outstanding Interpersonal Skills
Interpersonal skills are more important than technical skills. If you can develop social networks successfully
then you can have more successful career. Getting ahead in business-related fields is exceedingly difficult
unless you can relate effectively to other people. Workers are more likely to be bypassed for promotion or
terminated for poor interpersonal skills than for poor technical skills.
B. Develop Expertise, Passion, and Pride
Career advancement usually begins by the person developing expertise in a specialty or subspecialty.
Famous people typically launched their career by being good at something such as sales, accounting, or
engineering.
Although expertise is highly recommended, the workplace also demands that a person perform a variety of
tasks as is required in working on a team. Passion goes hand in hand with expertise, and contributes to
creativity and leadership. Developing expertise and being passionate about your work leads naturally to
being proud of what you produce.
Develop a Code of Professional Ethics
An ethical code determines what behaviour is right or wrong, good or bad, based on values. When faced
with an ethical dilemma, ask yourself three questions:
(1) Is it legal?
(2) Is it balanced? And (3) Is it right?
C. Perform Well Including Going beyond Your Job Description
Good job performance is the bedrock for any career, a principle supported by common sense and research.
Also, take on tasks not expected of you.
Performing well on all your assignments is also important because it contributes to the success syndrome, a
pattern in which the worker performs one assignment well and then has the confidence to take on an even
more difficult assignment.
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Human Relations­ MGMT611
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D. Create Good First Impressions
Favorable first impressions lead to continued contacts with internal and external customers, and can create a
halo about the quality of future work. Looking successful and projecting a sense of control also contributes
to a positive first impression. According to one leadership theory (the leader-member exchange model), the
leader forms in-groups based on favorable first impressions. Creating a negative first impression places one
in the out-group. Another key contributor to first impressions is a person's communication patterns and
method of self-presentation.
E. Document Your Accomplishments
Keeping an accurate record of job accomplishments can be valuable when being considered for promotion.
New learning should also be documented. Let key people know, in a tactful way, of your accomplishments.
F. Be Conventional In Your Behaviour
Conventional behaviour helps one gain acceptance. Areas for conformance include attendance and
punctuality, grooming, courtesy to superiors, and adherence to safety rules.
G. Take a Creative Approach to Your Job
Take initiatives. Organizations place heavy emphasis on creative problem solving. For maximum career
benefit, make innovative suggestions that are likely to earn money or save money.
H. Keep Growing through Continuous Learning and Self-Development
Keep on working hard to bring efficiency and quality to your work. Given that continuous learning is part
of the new model of career advancement, engaging in regular learning will help a person advance. Self-
development can include any type of learning but often emphasizes personal improvement and skill
development. Continuous learning and self-development follow the Japanese philosophy of kaizen, the
relentless quest for a better way and higher quality work.
I. Observe Proper Etiquette
Proper etiquette is important for career advancement because such behaviour is considered part of acting
professionally. Business etiquette is a special code of behaviour required in work settings.
J.  Develop a Proactive Personality
An active agent in taking control of forces around him or her stands a better chance of capitalizing on
opportunities. A proactive personality is a person relatively unconstrained by forces in the situation and
who brings about environmental change. Managers prefer proactive employees because they take the
initiative to take care of problems.
K. Take Sensible Risks
Successful career people, including proactive personalities, tend to be moderate risk takers. Not risking
anything can mean risking even more, including the inhibition of your career. Sensible and calculated risks
might be helpful in career advancement.
L. Learn to Manage Adversity
Some adversity is almost inevitable in an ambitious person's career. A general-purpose way of handling
adversity is to first get emotional support from a friend or family member, and then use the problem-
solving method.
It is important not to be bitter and cynical about your problem. Look to minimize the self-doubt that
comes from the mental script, fear narrative, in which you tell yourself that if you try again, something terrible
will happen. A current method of managing career adversity is to do a career boomerang, or be rehired by an
employer when a new job does not work out.
M. Develop the Brand Called You
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Sometime your name is associated with success. Success syndrome plays a role in your and organizational
success. The names of some actors/actresses are associated with success. Tom Peters urges career-minded
people to develop their credentials and their reputation to the extent that they stand out so much they
become a brand name. In this way you are not tied to one company or one job. You begin developing
brand-you by identifying the qualities or characteristics that distinguish you from co-workers.
Business etiquettes
Let us discuss some business manners and etiquettes.
·  Be polite to people in person
·  Write polite letters
·  Practice good table manners
·  Names should be remembered
·  Males and females should receive equal treatment
·  Shouting is out
·  The host or hostess pays the bill
·  Introduce the higher-ranking person to the lower-ranking person
·  Address superiors and visitors in their preferred way
·  Make appointments with high-ranking people rather than dropping in
·  When another person is opening a door to exit a room or building, do not jump ahead of him or
her
·  Be courteous about the use of common facilities or resources like the use of photocopy machine
·  Be sensitive to cross-cultural differences in etiquette
References:
Dubrin, A.J. (2005). Human Relations: Career and Personal Success. Upper Saddle River, New Jersey,
07458.
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Table of Contents:
  1. HUMAN RELATIONS:Some Guidelines for Effective Human Relations, Communication has 3meanings
  2. CULTURE AND PERSONALITY:Definition of sub culture, Definition of Personality, Types of Persons
  3. PERSONALITY AND STRESS:Personality, PERSONAL TOOLS TO CONTROL STRESS
  4. PERCEPTION AND INDIVIDUAL BEHAVIOUR:Three concepts of personality, Bias in Perception
  5. PERCEPTION AND GROUP BEHAVIOR:Characteristics of Groups, Individual and Group Behavior
  6. ATTITUDE AND BEHAVIOUR:Types of Attitudes, Steps to turn attitude into action
  7. PERSONAL MOTIVATION AND ACHIEVEMENT:Needs and Motivation, Self-discipline and motivation
  8. SOLVING PROBLEMS SKILLFULLY:Problem solving and cognition, Ways to solve problems
  9. CREATIVITY IN PROBLEM SOLVING:Barriers to creativity, Tips to solve problems creatively
  10. HANDLING PERSONAL ISSUES:Self-Defeating Behaviour, Positive attitude to tackle personal problems
  11. CONFLICT RESOLUTION:WHY SO MUCH CONFLICT EXISTS, TECHNIQUES FOR RESOLVING CONFLICTS
  12. COMMUNICATION AND HUMAN RELATIONS:Process of communication, Improving gender barriers to communication
  13. ORGANIZATIONAL COMMUNICATION:To improve listening skills, Types of organizational communication
  14. UNDERSTANDING COMMUNICATION STYLES:Modeling communication style, Sociability continuum
  15. SELF-ESTEEM:Building process of self-esteem, Self-esteem and public image
  16. BUILDING SELF-CONFIDENCE:The importance of self-confidence and self-efficacy, Balanced Self-Confidence:
  17. BECOMING A LEADER-1:Assessing leadership role, Traits and Characteristics of Effective Leaders
  18. BECOMING A LEADER-II:Theories of leadership, Developing leadership potential
  19. GLOBALIZATION AND CROSS-CULTURAL DIFFERENCES:Religious Values and Bicultural Identities
  20. IMPROVING CROSS-CULTURAL COMPETENCE:Strategies to improve cross-cultural relations, More steps to improve Cultural Relations
  21. BUILDING GOOD RELATIONS WITH MANAGERS:Impressing your manager, Coping with a problem manager
  22. BUILDING GOOD RELATIONS WITH CO-WORKERS:Make Co-workers feel important, Maintain Honest and Open Relationships
  23. BUILDING GOOD RELATIONS WITH CUSTOMERS:Salesperson Represents the Business, Approaching the Customer, Excuses vs. Objections
  24. CHOOSING A CAREER-1:Ten Myths about Choosing a Career, Attitude toward and Perceptions about Myself
  25. CHOOSING A CAREER-II:Choosing a career and developing a portfolio Career, Suggestions for career Preparation
  26. FINDING A JOB:Targeting your job search, The Internet and Résumé Database Services, Extreme Job Hunting
  27. SIGNIFICANCE OF RESUME:Major types of resumes, Electronic Submission of the Résumé
  28. IMPROVING INTERVIEW SKILLS:Successful interview, Knowing the employer or Organization
  29. IMPROVING WORK HABITS-1:Reasons of procrastination, Techniques for Reducing Procrastination
  30. IMPROVING WORK HABITS-2:Developing the proper attitudes and values, Time-management techniques
  31. NEW MODEL OF CAREER ADVANCEMENT:Career portability, HUMAN RELATIONS SELF-ASSESSMENT
  32. TAKING CONTROL OF YOURSELF:Develop Outstanding Interpersonal Skills, Business etiquettes
  33. EXERTING CONTROL ON OUTSIDE ENVIRONMENT:Important communication tip, Exerting control over the outside world
  34. MANAGING PERSONAL FINANCES-1:Your personal financial plan, Steps in budget making
  35. MANAGING PERSONAL FINANCES-2:Basic investment principles, Tolerance for Investment Risks, Types of investments
  36. ACHIEVING HAPPINESS-1:Finding happiness and enhancing your personal life, The key to happiness
  37. ACHIEVING HAPPINESS-2:The Five Principles of Psychological Functioning, Your mind and Happiness
  38. ACHIEVING HAPPINESS-3:Need for intimacy, Working out issues with relationships
  39. APATHY AND ITS REMEDIES:Let us try to understand the various definitions of apathy, Coping strategies for apathy
  40. ENHANCING PERSONAL ETHICS-1:Influence of Culture, Common ethical problems
  41. ENHANCING PERSONAL ETHICS-2:Common ethical problems, Guidelines for Behaving Ethically
  42. HELPING OTHERS GROW:Being a Nurturing, Positive Person, A list of mentoring behaviour, Coaching skills and techniques
  43. REVIEW-I:What is a Human Relation?, Meanings of Communication, Two types of stress, Some personal problem, Communication style
  44. REVIEW-II:Steps to build self-confidence, Globalization, Building Good Relations with Co-workers, Good work habits
  45. REVIEW-III:New model of career advancement, Choosing your investment, Tactics for Dealing with Difficult People